Of Love & Loss
by Nephi Lockwood
Summary: Leah didn't want to be a "witness" for Bella and Edward. And now she is paying the price when she imprints on a vampire. Leah/Marcus. Rated T because I am excessively paranoid. Terrible summary and title, please read! R&R please!
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note: This is my second Leah fanfic, and I got the idea from reading some amazing stories and falling in love with the pair. I haven't decided how it's going to end yet, but I know that I want a lot of hardships for Leah and Marcus ^_^! I'd like to thank Lonely Scarecrow for inspiring me with the story Cupid's Arrow. If you love these two as much as I do, it is definitely one of the best stories I have read.**

**And now I know that I am boring you to tears with my constant babbling, so I tell you one last thing:**

**I do not and unfortunately never will own Twilight.**

**Enjoy!**

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_If I smile and don't _  
_Believe_  
_Soon I know I'll wake_  
_From this dream_  
_Don't try to fix me;_  
_I'm not broken_  
_Hello_  
_I'm the lie_  
_Living for you so_  
_You can hide_  
~Hello by Evanescence

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**Ch. 1  
Leah's Pov**

Well, perfect. Just perfect. Just when I thought that I would finally be able to get on with my life, fate drops another bomb on me. Why am I not surprised?

Let's go back to the beginning…

I am, against my will and better judgment, acting as a witness to prove to the vampire royals that Bella and Edward's baby is not an immortal child. So, my life continues to suck, with everything in it revolving around the idiotic Bella Swan.

I'm lost in my thoughts, not paying attention _at all_ to the stupid event. Why the hell do _I _care? What have _they_ ever done for _me_?

Then, I happen to look up, and everything in my world changes.

I see him, for the first time. And, just as Jacob once told Bella, it is suddenly not gravity holding me here on the planet anymore. It's _him_.

A vampire. A freaking _vampire_. Why can't I be normal for _once_ and imprint on a normal human boy? Why? Does fate really hate me that much?

As I stare, I can sense that the pack knows what has happened to me. I block out their minds, not wanting to listen to anything they have to say about it. Edward is also looking at me now, his mind reading abilities proving exactly how intrusive they are.

In my desperation, searching for a way to leave and avoid any confrontation on Edward or the pack's part, I end up just running away yelling _screw it_ in my thoughts. I ignore the weird looks that I am sure I am receiving for my sudden spaz attack.

As I run, my feet pounding against the ground, I lose myself in the exhilarating feeling of the run. But soon I have to go back because of my new _bond_ to one of the mysterious cloaked vampires.

As I enter again, his eyes meet mine, and I can't look away. They are like twin pools of blood, diluted by milk. It _should_ creep me out, but instead I think that they are the most beautiful eyes in the world. Ugh. What has imprinting _done_ to me?

Another one of the ancient leeches, the one who seems to act as leader, walks over to my imprint, noticing his distracted expression after he looks away, and lays a single hand on his. Then he looks over at me, smiling like an idiot. I roll my eyes, thinking about how stupid he looks.

Then he walks over, to my greatest horror.

_This day just can't get _any worse_, can it_? I think to myself.

"What are you doing, Aro?" An angry voice calls out. I follow the idiotic leech's gaze to a very pissed looking vampire; with the only color he has being his lips and red irises.

"Caius, relax. I am just going to have a discussion."

That's when I find myself in the center of a bunch of furry bodies.

_Ugh, guys!_ I whine. _I'm a big girl now. I can take care of myself._

Sam and Jacob roll their eyes at me.

The vampire that pissed albino called Aro continues to come forward. Either he is brain dead, or he has a death wish. My wolf brothers aren't going to move anytime soon; so he's wasting his time.

"Wolf," he says by way of greeting. The growling coming from the pack and myself sounds like thunder. Hopefully he will realize that we are prepared to use violence and run away like the sissy he is.

He doesn't even take a single step back. There is just no getting through this guy's thick skull!

Edward walks forward then, his lips twitching in barely suppressed laughter.

"Um, Aro? Maybe we should allow them to phase back, and _then_ have this discussion," he suggests.

"Of course. How rude of me." He says.

~0o0~

"Seth, can you tell them that I got sick and had to stay home?" I moan. I really don't want to deal with this crap right now.

"Sorry. You heard Jake. That was an order."

I groan and push myself to my feet, dreading every step that takes me closer to the leeches' territory.

"Leah, stop being such a baby," Sam says. I contemplate slapping him before I decide that fighting him is more trouble then it's worth. I settle for pushing him out of the way as I attempt to enter the room gracefully. I fail miserably, tripping over Sam's foot.

"Mature," I say sarcastically. Then I punch him in the face.

He tackles me down and we fight before I finally manage to pin him to the ground.

"Don't mess with me when I'm in this type of mood," I hiss, jumping off of him.

I ignore the looks that I receive and sit calmly in an armchair. Today's my lucky day! Leeches, and Jacob, and Sam, oh my!

"You wanted to discuss something?" I say innocently and nonchalantly.

"Leah, I don't think you really want to do this," Edward says, emerging from the kitchen.

"Yeah. Tell me something I don't know." I reply venomously. "Leech," I mutter for good measure.

The three vampires in front of me exchange glances.

"We, meaning I in this particular case," Aro begins.

"If you have something to say, just say it." I snap. Why do vampires enjoy annoying cryptic hints at the truth?

"You're coming to Volterra with us," Aro says.

"I beg your pardon?"

"You're coming to-"

"No, don't say it again!" I exclaim, exasperated. They look at me, clearly wondering what the hell is wrong with me. "I am most certainly _not_ going with you to your crypt."

"You are." He says. I believe that he is trying to give me an _order_. Too damn bad. I take orders from _no one_ besides Jake, on the few occasions when he has used his Alpha Voice.

"Um, vampire?" Jacob says. "Leah and orders…they don't match so well."

"For once I am actually glad that you added your opinion, Jake," I say, giving him a friendly punch which he returns.

"You have no choice in the matter." This leech is _really_ starting to annoy me. He just cannot take a hint!

"I am not going with you, and that's final!" I shriek.

"Leah, we might need our ears one day," Edward calls in from the kitchen.

The two crypt keepers and my imprint exchange looks. Clearly they are not used to being so disrespected. I might actually be good for them, if I went. Just the thought that I can annoy them to death makes me rethink my hasty refusal.

Before I know it, lead vampire's ice cold hand is on top of mine. I snarl and pull it back, but his smile tells me all that I need to know. Stupid vampires and their mind tricks.

"Mmmm, yes." He breathes. He opens his eyes and his gaze pierces mine. "You _are_ coming."

"Fine." I snap. If nothing else, I can annoy them until they are truly dead. That would be an easy and fun experience.

Edward comes in, chuckling from what he heard in my mind. "She wants you to know that you will most likely become so annoyed within the first hour that you will bring her back screaming in agony for us to take her from you." Edward says, trying to control his laughter.

_Traitor_, I think at him. He winks at me, much to my displeasure. I have to choke back a growl.

"I shall enjoy the challenge," Aro and albino say at the same time. I roll my eyes. Again.

"Oh, by the way, I'm going to be bringing someone from the pack with me," I add.

"No." Albino says flatly.

_Why the hell not?_ I think.

"So it's okay to drag me across the world to Italy, but it's not okay for me to bring someone to ease the pain of being away from home?"

"One wolf is enough." I think I might actually hate albino more than idiotic happy vampire. Shocking.

"Now, Caius, it's only fair-"

"Aro," albino interrupts. "No."

"Caius, I'm going to agree to this." Aro says with a smile at me. Seriously, does this guy _ever_ get pissed off? "It's a small price to pay for what will be gained from her presence in Volterra.

"Aro," my imprint says. "Why?"

"Because I feel like it."

My head snaps up when I hear my imprint speak for the first time, and I take in what I couldn't with our gazes locked earlier. He has pin-straight raven black hair like the leader, except his falls to his shoulders. He has the same chalky skin as the others, but his features are classic and defined.

Eventually, the matter of me coming to Italy with them is resolved, and the lucky pack member coming with me is Embry. I know. Join in with my groan fest. No one wanted to be away from the imprints, and I wouldn't let Seth come, so Embry got lucky enough to come with me, though he didn't seem that depressed about it. That increases my opinion of him greatly.

The packs were actually really supportive. I know, surprising, right? They wished me luck, as if I was following a normal human guy to Italy instead of chasing after my _carnivorous _vampire imprint. I almost feel bad for being such a jerk before.

Carlisle picked up Embry and I at my house in his black Mercedes. The ride to where the overly happy vampire, Aro, told us to meet is silent. It's almost too quiet. Right before we pull up, Carlisle turns to look at us.

"Are you sure you want to do this?" He asks.

"No need to worry, Dr. Fang. We're all good." I say. Then the car rolls to a stop and I jump out the door.

"Oh my God." I say, taking in all of the vampires.

"The smell is going to suffocate us," Embry agrees.

"Sorry that you're going to die with me," I say, actually meaning it.

"Don't worry about it. Maybe we can take them down with us."

"Doubt it."

We walk over to where the five black-cloaked leaders are standing. I quickly introduce Embry and wait for them to introduce themselves. I now know their names: overly happy vampire is Aro, pissed off albino is Caius, my imprint is Marcus, blonde number one is Sulpicia, and blonde number two is Athenodora.

"Do you have a, um, shorter version of your names?" I ask the two women.

"I usually use Cia as a nickname," Sulpicia says.

"I guess you could call me Dora. Or Athena."

"Dora it is."

Once we board the flight, Aro points out everyone. Chelsea and Afton are in the front two seats, followed by the twins, Jane and Alec. Then there is Felix and Renata, followed by Demetri and Heidi. The rest I didn't care enough to pay attention to.

Guess what? Give up?

The Voltouri have a freaking _private jet_. And let me tell you: that thing is pure luxury. Oh my God, it was an awesome and very comfortable ride to Italy.

Once we get to the castle (there's no better way to describe it), Embry and I decide to head to sleep early. We have agreed that tomorrow is going to be a long day.

Aro decided that our rooms should be right next to each other, much to our annoyance. I had to suppress a really loud, exasperated groan when he told us this. This is practically _sharing_ a room with Embry. It's disgusting.

I toss and turn for a few hours before I finally manage to fall into a sleep-like state.

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**Author's Note: So, how was it? Did you like it? Please comment! I can't tell you how important your comments are to my writing. They help me make myself continue, even through slumps.**

**Review!**

**Pretty please?  
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	2. Chapter 2

**Author's Note: I had absolutely no idea what was going to happen in this chapter, so it probably didn't turn out very good. But at least I know what happens next.**

**I do not own Twilight.**

**Enjoy!  
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**_I am a little bit of loneliness, a little bit of disregard_  
_Handful of complaints but I can't help the fact_  
_That everyone can see these scars_  
_I am what I want you to want, what I want you to feel_  
_But it's like no matter what I do, I can't convince you_  
_To just believe this is real_  
_So I, let go watching you turn your back like you always do_  
_Face away and pretend that I'm not_  
_But I'll be here cause you're all that I've got_

_I can't feel the way I did before_  
_Don't turn your back on me_  
_I won't be ignored_  
_Time won't heal this damage anymore_  
_Don't turn your back on me I won't be ignored  
_~Faint by Linkin Park

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**Ch. 2****  
Leah's POV**

I wake up the next morning wondering where the hell I am and wondering why it stinks of vampire. Then I remember what happened yesterday, and try to convince myself that I'm not in a dream.

I've finally imprinted!

I give a little squeal of excitement before I remember Embry's presence in the next room over. Oops.

"Jeez, Leah!" He exclaims. "How many times do we have to remind you that we might need our ears someday?"

"Cut the crap, Embry. We got a long day ahead of us."

I quickly pull on a pair of black skinny jeans and one of my many tank tops. Then I head out the door. Embry is already in the hallway.

"Do you know where we might actually find some decent breakfast in this crypt?" I ask him.

"No clue. Maybe we should ask someone."

_Absolutely_ not.

"Maybe we should just wander around and hope that we aren't going in circles," I suggest.

"Fine," he sighs, seeing that it would be pointless to argue with me. I smile. He's learning.

So, after about an hour of searching the castle in vain, I finally resign myself to taking Embry's suggestion.

I feel a cold hand on my arm, and immediately whirl around with a glare. Then I realize who it is.

"Hey, Embry?" I call, my eyes locked in his stare.

"Yeah?"

"Go on without me."

I can't break away from his stare, though I want to. It's part of the whole damn concept of imprinting. This is going to be a long stay.

"Yes?" I ask, faking an innocent expression.

"One, the kitchen is that way." He points down the hall in the opposite direction from where we were headed.

"We would have found it eventually," I snap, insulted.

"Follow," he says, walking down the hall that way. He doesn't even seem to care if I go after him or not.

Like I had a choice?

Once he leads me to the kitchen, he takes a seat and waits for me to get a bowl of cereal before he starts with the twenty questions plan of action. I barely manage to suppress a groan when he tells me that he wants answers.

"What do you want to know?" I sigh, exasperated already. And it's only eight in the morning.

Joy.

"First, why do we have such a strong connection? I have never seen you before in my life."

"I imprinted on you," I say with the same emotionless voice as Marcus.

"_What_?"

Clearly he has no idea what _imprinting _is.

"It's a wolf thing," I snap.

"Do explain."

I sigh and tell him everything that I know about the concept of imprinting, which, I admit, is only slightly more than he knows. When I'm finished, I look up at him, and almost look right back down. He's horrified.

Of course! Why else would fate give me a soul mate? Apparently, they still have more on their list of _How to…Make Leah's Life a Living Hell_. The next thing on said list must be to "Give Leah a soul mate repulsed by the very idea of being her imprint."

"I would appreciate it if you would say something instead of looking at me with that horrified expression," I say, annoyed.

"Why?" It's barely a whisper, but it packs all of the wounding potential of a knife. Which irritates me exceedingly.

"The hell if _I_ know," I snap. It figures. I get something I want only to have it backfire on me.

Typical day in the life of Leah Clearwater.

"No. No way," he mutters. I watch him with a slightly stunned expression as he smoothly glides out of his chair. He is almost out the door before I can reply.

"You don't believe." As I said the words, I became even more convinced of their truth.

He meets my gaze for a split second and then walks out.

I angrily march into my bedroom, slamming it shut behind me. I look around, and find a stereo system. I smile evilly, my plan already formed in my head.

I pull a CD out of one of my bags and start blasting my favorite song of all time, and a song that really works with my life right now: Faint by Linkin Park. And I know that everyone in this castle can hear it.

"Damn it, Leah! Let me in!" Embry screams, pounding on my door. I just heard him and run over to let him in.

"What do you want?" I snap, turning down the music.

"Aro wishes to see you."

"So, what? Now you're a message boy?" I ask.

"Apparently," he mutters.

"Tell Aro to go die in a hole," I snap.

"Tell him yourself." He walks out, and I sigh. I turn the music off and follow him out of the room.

I wander around until I find Aro. As soon as I do, I angrily stalk up to him with the best glare that I can manage.

"What the hell do you want?" I snap.

"Ah, Leah. A pleasure." He says happily, which pisses me off even more than the fact that he interrupted my ranting time.

"Cut the crap and answer the question," I practically snarl. His eyes widen fractionally, but he doesn't waver in his eternal happiness.

"I simply wanted to know if you found everything to your liking," he says. I swear that my blood just started to boil.

"You wanted me for _that_?" I shriek, unable to suppress my anger. Then, in a quiet voice laced with my annoyance, I say, "No. Everything is _not_."

"Oh? And what isn't?"

_Oh, you really don't want to know, Aro._

"You, and Marcus, and the fact that I can't get any alone time!"

"Oh."

Well, it's at least comforting to know that two thousand year old vampires are even prone to extended periods of laughable stupidity.

"Yep. See you around!" I answer, attempting to sound cheery. I think that we could both tell that I was faking, but whatever. Then I whirl around and practically run out of the room.

I decide to take a walk around Volterra. I seriously need to blow off some steam, not to mention recover from the embarrassment that came with realizing that everyone in the castle probably heard my little outbursts.

I walk quickly out of the walls of the castle, thankful for the fresh air that I immediately received. The castle smells like…well, bloodsuckers. Don't judge me!

As I walk, I find that I might actually enjoy my time here. The city itself is actually very nice.

I take a seat on a bench that seemed to appear out of thin air, and resolve on coming back later tonight. Night is always better than the day for things like this.

When I finally return to the castle, I immediately go back into the kitchen, desperate for something to eat. I was out there for longer than I thought.

I go back into my room when the pain sets in. I should have expected it. I've been away from my imprint too long. I groan and change my tank top for my walk tonight. I grab my cash and shove it deep into my pocket. Then I slip my iPod earphones in and exit my room.

I was right. The city is so much better at night, and the stars are simply incredible. I sit back down on the bench I was at earlier and just breathe in the crisp night air. It is such a perfect night.

It happened on my way back. I wasn't paying attention, not to mention the fact that I was blasting metal music into my ears. I should have known that something would ruin my perfect night.

The smell is the only thing that alerts me of their presence. The sickly sweet scent of vampire makes me whirl around, and panic for a half second.

The vampires are surrounding me.

I growl, trying not to lose my temper and turn into a giant wolf. Imagine what the locals would think! It's times like these when I wish we could just have claws if we wanted.

"Why hello," the one with the long blonde hair says. I assume that he is their leader.

They approach, trying to get behind me. Like that would ever happen. How inexperienced do I look?

I whirl around, looking for my opening. I quickly come up with a plan.

I break through their ranks, ignoring any limbs that are reaching out to grab me. I run into an alley, where I feel that I can safely phase. When they show up and block the entrance, I shift.

The astonishment on their faces is quite hilarious. I wish that I were human so that I could start rolling on the ground, cracking up.

Instead, I growl at them, pleased to see some of them start backing off. The others I could deal with.

I charge them, and start ripping them to shreds, my protective instinct kicking in for some reason. I kill at least one of them before a roundhouse kick from the leader sends me flying against the walls of the alley. I hiss when I hear the bones break, but I continue in the deadly dance until a lucky shot sends me flying again.

This time I can't get up as easily, so I start growling instead of launching myself right back into the attack, hoping to give my breaks a chance to heal.

No such luck.

The others gain confidence when they see that I'm weakening, so they converge on me.

I hear a few more bones crack before a punch to the head knocks me out.

**~0o0~**

I'm alive.

Granted, I feel like crap, but at least I am alive. And I don't think that the vampires took me. They must have thought they had killed me or something.

I am still lying on the disgusting ground, but I am so happy to be alive that I don't even care. I can't bring myself to be my usual self.

I groan when I attempt to sit up, the only thing that alerts me to the fact that I am in my human form. I look down and see that I am dressed.

Something that disturbs me deeply.

"Leah!" A voice calls. I squint against the morning sunlight and realize that Embry is here as well.

"Why are you here?" I croak. Damn, my throat is _dry_.

"I came as soon as he called," he says, confused.

That statement scares me.

"Who?"

"Some random person," he says. He's trying too hard. I can tell that he's lying.

"You _will _tell me later." I demand. "And give me a bottle of water."

He tosses one over and I catch it, so happy to finally have something to drink. I notice how he wisely didn't give me an answer to my first demand and glare at him.

"I assume that the castle is probably in a frenzy," I say carelessly.

"Yeah. We better get back."

So we walk back to the home of the three most irritating vampires in the world.

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**Author's Note: Please review!**

**Check out the song Faint by Linkin Park. It is one of the three songs that this story is based on, and I must say that it is _epic_. ^_^ Pretty much anything by Linkin Park is epic, though.  
**

**Thanks for reading, and please let me know if this chapter was as bad as I think it was.**


	3. Chapter 3

**Author's Note: Here's Ch. 3! Hope you like it.**

**I do not own Twilight.**

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**_Memories consume_  
_Like opening the wound_  
_I'm picking me apart again_  
_You all assume_  
_I'm safe here in my room_

_I don't want to be the one_  
_The battles always choose_  
_'Cause inside I realize_  
_That I'm the one confused_

_I don't know what's worth fighting for_  
_Or why I have to scream_  
_I don't know why I instigate_  
_And say what I don't mean_  
_I don't know how I got this way_  
_I know it's not alright  
_~Breaking the Habit by Linkin Park

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**Ch. 3****  
Leah's POV**

After I walked through the hell that awaited me upon my entrance into the castle, I managed to safely make it to my room. Right now, I'm sitting on my bed, lost in thought, with some random song blaring into my ears from my miraculously unharmed iPod.

Who was there? Who stopped those vampires from killing me? I know who I'd _like_ it to be, but I also know that it is an impossible wish.

Immediately I questioned Embry again, but he kept sticking with his lie about not recognizing the voice. He really needs to work on his lying skills.

I have gone through every possibility, and I still have no idea who it could have been. It had to be someone that I know, or they wouldn't have known that I was staying with the Voltouri, or about Embry's presence in Italy.

I almost wonder if the person who called could have been a Cullen, but once again I immediately dismiss the idea, because Alice can't see me, and the person who called had to have fought off the vampires, or maybe scared them away. No offense to Embry, but he isn't that good.

So I am back where I started. This whole thing is pissing me off.

For the first time since my return, I leave my room. My goal? To enter the kitchen unnoticed, steal a bottle of some form of wine, and find a box of chocolate. For some reason that idea appeals to me as helpful.

I quickly slip out of my room in my socks and run almost silently down the hall. When I make it to the kitchen, I almost believe that I can pull this off.

But of course, since it's me and fate just hates me that much, Marcus just so happens to be seated at the table, as well as Athenodora. I have to suppress a groan in order to continue my already failed mission.

As soon as I shut the door, their heads snap up.

"Don't judge me," I snap. I look around and finally find a bottle of strong wine. I grab it and root through the refrigerator until I find a small box of chocolate. Then I start to flee the room as fast as possible.

Sometimes I wonder why I even try.

Naturally, as soon as I yank the door open, a cold hand claps onto my arm, and I almost run into Aro.

"Leah!"

I don't know exactly what my reaction was, but it was obviously amusing to all three vampires in the room.

And I _still_ don't know who's behind me, even though I know that I should.

I twist my arm, hoping to rip the vampire's arm off, but no such luck. Finally, I allow myself to be dragged back into the room. There are other ways to escape a room than the door.

When I feel my arm released, I run to the other side of the room from the vampires and whirl around. My eyes probably looked wild and insane, but as of right now, I don't care.

"Why can't you vampires get it through your heads that I need alone time?" I almost shriek. I realize that I am in a dangerous position of breaking the bottle of wine over one of their heads. Can't have that, can we? I slowly lower my arm.

"If you wanted to be alone, why are you in here?" Athenodora asks.

"Because I'm depressed, upset, annoyed, and whole bunch more things, so I came down here to get some wine and chocolate to make it all go away!" I'm slightly calmer now, and I realize that I'm making something out of nothing, but I can't stop now.

I walk out of the room, retaining the little dignity I have left to lose.

Marcus's POV

"Well that was odd," Athenodora says after the shifter leaves.

"Yes, but a little oddness adds flavor to eternity," Aro counters. Joy. Another fight looms over us. I should probably get Caius before they do something they'll regret.

I tune out their arguments, returning to the void that is now my mind. Ever since the Incident, I've been stuck here. Until a certain shapeshifter entered my life…

It's amazing how different your feelings can be from what you _believe_ you should feel. The _imprint_ is causing me to want to go after her, to want to love her, but my _logic_ is telling me that it would be a bad thing. I can't love again, not after her.

But the strange thing is that there is something…_different_ in the shifter. Something almost similar to myself.

I'm out of my chair before I am even aware that I was planning on it.

Weird.

Well, Aro and Athena are boring me to tears anyway, so it's not like I don't have an excuse to leave. I walk through the door, and am only a little bit down the hall before I see the shifter kicking a wall. I try my hardest to keep a straight face, really I do, but I can't. It was pretty much the last thing I expected to see.

"Is there a problem?" I ask, not able to hide the amusement in my voice.

She jumps and whirls around to face me, glaring at me.

"Do you _want_ something?" She snaps.

"No, not really."

"Then leave me alone."

I don't know what it was that made me ask, but for some reason I had to know why I could see something almost like myself in her.

The story she told is not unlike my own, and yet it is different in every aspect. It's strange to see how differently she can handle a similar event. She appears to be moving on, no…never moving on, but…handling it. Unlike myself.

"Leah!" A voice calls. We both turn and see the other shifter…what's-his-name. It just occurred to me that I don't know either of their names.

"Embry," she says. Then she turns back to me. "I would say it's been a pleasure, but since you reopened and salted old wounds, it really hasn't."

And she turns her back on me for the second time today.

Back in my room, I have time to wonder about what I did today and last night. I honestly can't believe that I saved her. I don't regret it, but I shouldn't have. I already have enough people that have issues with me without adding _them_ to the mix. I can only imagine what they'll do next.

I do the only thing that I can when the depression starts to eat at me: I grab my guitar. I don't even realize what I'm playing until half way through the song. What made me play Desperado by the Eagles? As much as it relates to me, I don't like to _remind_ myself that it relates to me.

When I decide that I did absolutely nothing, I fall back on the bed and stare at the ceiling, letting everything crush me.

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_Your prison is walking through this world all alone._

_ Don't your feet get cold in the winter time?_  
_ The sky won't snow and the sun will shine._  
_ It's hard to tell the night time from the day._  
_ And you're losing all your highs and lows_  
_ aint it funny how the feeling goes_  
_ away..._

_ Desperado,_  
_ Why don't you come to your senses?_  
_ come down from your fences, open the gate._  
_ It may be rainin', but there's a rainbow above you._  
_ You better let somebody love you._  
_You better let somebody love you_  
_Before it's too late._  
_~Desperado by the Eagles_

_

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_

**Author's Note: So, how was it? Be honest with me. **

**As I said before: any song by Linkin Park is totally epic.  
**


	4. Chapter 4

**Author's Note: Ch. 4!**

**I do not own Twilight.**

**Enjoy!**

**

* * *

**_(When this began)  
I had nothing to say  
And I get lost in the nothingness inside of me  
And I let it all out to find  
That I'm not the only person with these things in mind  
But all that they can see the words revealed  
Is the only real thing that I've got left to feel  
(Nothing to lose)  
Just stuck, hollow and alone  
And the fault is my own, and the fault is my own_

_I wanna heal, I wanna feel what I thought was never real  
I wanna let go of the pain I've felt so long  
(Erase all the pain till it's gone)  
I wanna heal, I wanna feel like I'm close to something real  
I wanna find something I've wanted all along  
Somewhere I belong  
_~Somewhere I Belong- Linkin Park

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**Ch. 4****  
Leah's POV**

"That was too weird," I say to Embry later.

"Definitely. What did he want anyway?"

"No clue. He never exactly got to his point."

"Well, whatever. If it was something important-"

"I think he just wanted to annoy me," I interrupt. Embry's great at pep talks and therapy, but he doesn't realize that Marcus asked me about my crappy past. And did he tell me anything about his?

Nope.

"Leah!"

"Oh my God, Embry kill me now."

"Why?"

"Aro alert."

"You mean freakishly happy vampire?"

"Ya."

"Joy."

"Pretty much."

I look around quickly, but there aren't any windows in this particular hallway, and Aro has already seen me, so…

"I've been looking for you."

_Idiot_, I think. I wish that I could say that, but I can't. So I settle for making him _look_ like an idiot.

"You just saw me." I roll my eyes and turn to leave, annoyed with his idiocy.

"Yes, but you ran away as soon as I walked into the room."

"Maybe I don't want to see _you_," I suggest. I almost regret it until he starts laughing.

"Um…" Embry says, clearly wondering rather to stay or run away.

"Save yourself, Embry."

I almost wish that I had to tell him twice. He's down the hall as soon as I finish telling him to go. I wish that _I_ were that lucky. Do _I_ get to flee Aro's dangerous stupidity? No. Funny how that works.

"What do you want, Aro?" I sigh. Maybe if I play along he'll leave me alone. Watch: if I _want_ to find him I won't be able to. I guarantee it.

When he walks away, I realize that I didn't here a word he said. Oops. I wasn't paying attention.

I trudge back to my room and pull out my crappy, beat-up old cell phone. I figure I should probably call home and let them know that the vampires didn't decide to have wolf for dinner. I really don't need to add _their_ stupidity to my growing-by-the-day list of problems. I actually wonder if life would be easier if I went back.

It probably would, if the pain of being separated from an imprint doesn't count as a problem.

"Leah!" Seth practically shouts when I finally manage to get him to pick up one of the many phones he has access to.

"Hey, Seth. I'm alive. They haven't eaten me. Yet." Not the most supportive thing to say, but I'm still tired, hungry, depressed annoyed, etc., so you have no right to judge me.

"That's a good thing." I roll my eyes.

"Jacob, you idiot, put Seth back on the phone!"

I can just picture his wolfish smile when he replies to that. "Good to know that Volterra hasn't changed you, Leah."

"Jake, seriously. Give Seth his damn phone back. You have no idea of the day I've had."

"Fine. Jeez, Leah. Relax. Seriously. I hear that helps with problems."

Now I _really_ wish that I were back in La Push with them. That way I could break his face for that comment.

"I'm back," Seth says.

"Good." Awkward silence. "So, how are things at home?"

"Decent. No killer vampires since you left."

"Uh huh."

"So…yeah. How's Italy?"

"Worse than home. I seriously think about going back home with Embry sometimes."

"No. You can't. First you have to break the vampiric mafia."

I can't stop a smile from coming across my face at that.

"You know, you're right. Thanks, Seth."

"Everyone says hi. And they want to know why you couldn't bust your ass to call us sooner."

"Tell them that I've been busy."

Well, not a total lie.

"Alright."

Silence.

"Bye."

"Bye, Seth."

Why was that such an awkward conversation? I can't figure it out. It just doesn't make any sense. Seth and I have always been close.

I pull open the door to my room and pace around for a while, needing to move. When I finally do sit down, I can't stay seated for long.

"Embry!" I call through the wall. I here a muffled bump, probably Embry's head on the ceiling, and then he responds.

"What now, Leah?"

"We need to phase."

So together we walk out of the castle, until we reach a secluded area full of trees and other appealing natural stuff. Everything in the castle is so…_artificial_. Even the vampires. Maybe that's what I was missing.

Anyway, we phase and run a little bit, coming back sooner than either one of us would have liked.

The walk back to the castle is a slow one. I think that we're both weighted down by our dread. The castle is not a good place for us. The least Aro could have done is bought us some apartments near by. It's not like it would have killed him to help someone beside himself for once.

When we walk back into the castle, it's quiet.

Too quiet.

As corny and idiotic as that sounds, it's true. We can't make out a sound.

I decide that I might as well check out the library. It's not like there aren't books that I like. I _do_ read. When I can.

I push open the door, and immediately stop. How the hell am I going to find anything in _here_? There are so many books that it seems impossible.

Luckily, there are a couple classics that I like, so I find them easily. I decide to read _Pride & Prejudice_ again.

I'm about two hundred pages in before I hear the door close softly. I decide to ignore it and keep reading.

I get to my favorite part when I hear the soft _thud_ of a book hitting the ground. I whirl around, prepared to use my book as a weapon before I see who it is.

Then I want to leave. I don't need this right now.

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**Author's Note: I'm surprised at how easily this chapter came to me. I thought that it would be a hard one to write, but it turns out that I was wrong.**

**The last of my three majorly inspiring songs. The last Linkin Park song for a while. I'm starting to get sick of their lyrics.**

**So how was it? Review please! **

**Oh, and if you have any ideas, let me know. I know how the next chapter starts, but not how it ends, and I have no clue what comes after that.  
**


	5. Chapter 5

**Author's Note: Here's chapter five. It's a bit...odd. Just bare with me. The plot starts moving soon.**

**I do not own Twilight.**

**Enjoy this chapter!**

**

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**_You used to captivate me by your resonating light  
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind  
Your face it haunts my once pleasant dreams  
Your voice it chased away all the sanity in me_

_These wounds won't seem to heal  
This pain is just too real  
There's just too much that time cannot erase  
_~My Immortal by Evanescence

_

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_**Ch. 5****  
Leah's POV**

Kill me.

No, really.

Kill me.

I won't even come back as a ghost to haunt you.

Now _why_, exactly, do I want to die?

Because mysterious stranger happens to be Marcus, and I don't need his cryptic, emotionless crap right now. Yes, on a normal day I _would_ be falling over myself for a moment like this.

But not today.

So, just to show him how much I _don't_ care that he's here, I go back to my book. Well, I _try_ to. The smell is just about impossible to ignore. It may not be full vampire stench, but it _still_ isn't something that can be ignored.

I sigh and save my page.

"What do you _want_?" I snap.

"I wasn't _expecting _to find you here. I just wanted the quiet."

"Yes, because the castle isn't totally silent or anything absurd like that," I say dryly.

"I like to be in the library more than anywhere else."

"Picky, much?"

"Very."

He sits down and we try to ignore the imprint trying to force us closer to each other, lapsing into a very welcome silence. But, of course, all good things must come to an end.

"So…what are you reading?" He asks. I assume that he's bored and couldn't think of anything else to say.

I raise my eyebrow. "_Pride & Prejudice_."

"Really?"

"I'm insulted. I _do_ read, you know." I say.

"And where are you?"

"The part where Elizabeth gives Mr. Darcy a verbal slap to the face."

"Ah?"

"It's my favorite part."

"_Why_?"

"Because Mr. Darcy needed his ass kicked."

"Why do you _like_ it so much?"

"I just told you."

This conversation is getting nowhere.

"Don't you think that Elizabeth could have held back? I mean, she believed Wickham so easily."

"Yes, but that was Darcy's own fault. The way _I_ see it, he had it coming. Had he not been such a jerk that first time, and pretty much every time after that, she would have been less inclined to believe Wickham, because that instant dislike would not have been formed. She's smart enough that she would have been suspicious, even if only a little." I argue.

"That is…true," he says. It appeared that he was searching for another word, but couldn't find one. He is also obviously shocked that it _is_ a smart statement. I find that just a _little_ insulting. "And a very intelligent deduction."

"I can be smart when I want to be," I snap. Apparently, he seeks to offend me. Two can play at this game, even if one player _is_ unwilling. And he's playing with the master.

"When you _want_ to be?"

"It's much more than I can say for _you_," I say. I smile evilly. This could be fun.

After that, we don't talk much. Actually, after that we don't talk _at all_. That's fine by me. When I finish my book, I pull out my iPod. I take that thing _everywhere_.

I decide to leave about halfway through that first song. As I get up though, I hear something downstairs. My first thought is: _Embry, what the hell did you_ do? But that thought is proven wrong when Embry comes running in to tell us what happened.

I meet Marcus's gaze and run into the book piles to phase. Then we run out of the room.

**~0o0~**

I swear: only I have luck this bad.

After we ran from the library, the Voltouri guard was already there. And I immediately recognized long-blonde-locks vampire from the other night. Looks like he switched from one army to another.

And apparently the other vampires had gotten home right before them.

The noise I heard in the library had been from the fight.

I don't remember much after we joined the battle. All I know is that it was incredibly easy and that we won.

After that I passed out.

So, imagine my shock when I woke up in the hospital wing. No body will tell me how I got here. All that I know is that I blacked out a few minutes after the battle ended.

I have several theories, but I have no idea if I'm right or not. These people are annoying me to the extreme. And I thought that the _Cullens_ were bad. I had no idea how bad a vampire could be until I came here.

Right now, I'm in my room, throwing a random ball I found hidden in my bag up and down. It seems that when I'm not fighting or arguing with someone, it is actually quite boring. I wonder if vampire royalty swim…

I grab my bag out of my closet, slip on a pair of flip-flops, and walk out of the room, determined to go shopping. I don't know what I'll buy, but looking through the stores should clam me down enough to think.

I walk down the roads of Volterra until I come to a small shop that I saw on my walk before. I shift through the racks and buy a couple plain tank tops, not really in to it. The real reason I came was to think.

And think I do. Everything that has happened comes crashing in like ocean waves, some of them beating me down, and others just slipping by.

But the thing I think about most is Marcus. I'm completely lost when it comes to him. _He_ seems to have a general understanding of _me_, but I don't know a thing about him, except that he always looks extremely bored with life.

Maybe he's just seen too much of Caius' anger and Aro's overly enthusiastic idiocy.

I want to believe that, but something tells me that his problem is deeper, hidden under his expressionless exterior. I just can't figure out what it could be.

I resolve to figure it out if it kills me. It probably has something to do with why he was so horrified to hear about the imprint. In which case, I might not _want_ to know what his problem is.

But the imprint is controlling me now, taking away my common sense.

I walk back with my few bags, still deep in thought. Marcus doesn't seem to want my presence for anything other than his amusement and my annoyance at his amusement.

I'd almost rather be a victim of Sam's mind than walk around wondering about my imprint who seeks to irritate me.

That's another one of the items on my long list of my problems that I have to work out. The imprint pretty much got rid of that, but I still can't help my bitter feelings toward Sam and Emily. Oh, by the way. They are going to have a baby girl soon. I wonder if she's come yet. Last I heard they were going to name her Dawn.

The one good thing about my being in Volterra chasing after my imprint is that I might not be able to make it back for their wedding. I won't shed a tear for that. It was actually a goal of mine to miss the wedding. I really don't need people talking about me and saying how I shouldn't come because I'm too clingy to Sam and all that crap.

When I get back in, I realize that my head is no clearer than when I left.

Figures.

I fall back on the bed and let the pain and the other things crush me.

* * *

**Author's Note: Odd, right? It came from this weird idea I've had for a while. I've always wanted them to get into an argument over that book, and for Marcus to realize that Leah is actually smart.**

**I figured that we needed some imprint drama, something I've been neglecting. Totally overlooked that.**

**Songs have to do with the general plot; not the individual chapters.**

**As always, review and let me know how it was. And if you have an idea, ideas are welcome.**

**Thanks for reading!  
**


	6. Chapter 6

**Author's Note: This chapter was impossible to write! I had no idea what happened after the last chapter. The plot is finally starting to make itself clear, though, so that's a good thing. These filler chapters are always the hardest for me to write, but they're necessary, unfortunately.**

**I do not own Twilight.**

**Enjoy!**

**

* * *

**

_Now that it's over, I just wanna hold her_  
_I'd give up all the world to see_  
_That little piece of Heaven looking back at me_

_Now that it's over, I just wanna hold her_  
_I've gotta live with the choices I made_  
_And I can't live with myself today  
_~Lucy by Skillet

* * *

**Ch. 6****  
Leah's POV**

My first sleepless night has come and gone, and something tells me that it won't be the last.

I roll out of bed and decide to wander aimlessly around the castle for a while. Everything here is so archaic, and _way_ over the top. Like Aro.

I have only gone a little bit down the hall when I hear the voices. I know that they aren't close, so I chance walking a little farther toward them.

"That's what you're being paid for," a familiar voice says. I know that voice. But…I can't match the name without seeing them.

"It's harder than you think!" I feel like I should know that rough, raspy voice that follows.

I realize that they are planning something, something that they want to remain a secret. But what? What could possibly be important enough to meet in the dead of night in a chamber that they know werewolves are in? If Caius is a representation of all the vampires, then vampires hate werewolves.

Oh, this just keeps getting better.

"How hard is it to kill a werewolf?" The first voice exclaims. Suddenly my stomach drops to the floor. They want us dead. Well, one of us, anyway.

"You'd be surprised."

I run back down the hall the way I came, trying to process what I just heard. One of us is in danger. Extreme danger. This is a life-or-death thing.

I have to warn Embry.

But first I have to create an alibi so that they have no reason to believe that I was eavesdropping on them.

I decide to get Embry and go to the kitchen. No vampire _actually_ uses the kitchen. It should be perfectly vacant this time of night.

I slip out my nail file and start to pick the lock on Embry's door. When I hear the near silent _click_ I relax a little. I'm in.

I see that Embry's asleep. I almost feel bad that I am about to wake him up.

"Embry," I hiss. Nothing. "Embry!" I slap him.

He jumps about a foot in the air. "Wha? What did I miss?"

The expression on his face is hysterical. If it weren't such an urgent thing, I would have started rolling on the floor laughing.

"Come with me."

"Leah?" He says. Then his eyes narrow. "How the hell did you get _in_ here?"

"No time to explain. Just follow."

We go around the corner, keeping our footsteps silent as we go through the halls. We're almost at the kitchen when the door swings open and we literally run into Marcus.

I stagger a little bit from walking into a rock and he reaches out reflexively to steady me. I narrow my eyes.

"_Please_ tell me that there aren't any more leeches in there!"

He shakes his head.

"Good." I attempt to control my heartbeat that suddenly worked its way into overdrive. "Embry, come on."

We walk in, and I immediately attempt to find something to eat. Nothing that doesn't need to be cooked. Damn. Where are their chefs when you need 'em?

I slam the door to the last cabinet, scowling at the air.

"So…you woke me up…because?" Embry says. I walk over and look around conspiratorially. That's when I notice the smell. My head snaps up and I see Marcus standing in the shadows.

"I woke you up because I over heard people talking in the hallway. They want one of us dead, and my money is on myself." I see the dark form in the shadows stiffen, which gives me my first suspect.

"What?"

"Someone wants one of us dead," I hiss, pronouncing each word, trying to drive them into his brain like I'm talking to a kindergartener.

"Oh. But who would want that?"

"I can think of a few vampires that would." My eyes meet Marcus's. I stare at him in open challenge, daring him to look away. He breaks the stare first. I smile triumphantly. I win.

"_Who_?"

"Well, we know how Cauis feels about werewolves, Marcus seems to hate my guts, and Aro…I don't know. There's just something…off about him. And not just his incredible idiocy, either."

"I can assure you that none of _us_ are your mystery vampire." Marcus says, coming out of the shadows for the first time. Embry just about jumps out of his skin. He's jumpy tonight.

"Oh, really?" I challenge. "How do _you_ know? Do you have mind raping abilities that we aren't aware of?"

He just raises his brow when I say _mind raping_.

"It's what Leah calls mind _reading_ abilities," Embry clarifies. I roll my eyes at their combined stupidity.

"Thank you for the translation, Embry." I snap.

"Yeah," he says, pushing his chair out from the table. "I think I'll leave you two to do whatever it is you two do."

Before I can protest, he's out of the room.

"You want something?" I ask, walking around the kitchen island. I refuse to give any information tonight without getting some of my own questions answered first. Like why he always looks bored with life.

"No, not particularly." I can feel his gaze burning into me, and I clench my fists to avoid letting him know how much that affects me and to avoid doing some other stupid thing. Not this time.

"So…then…" _Oh my God this is so awkward!_ "Why are you here?" I snap.

He doesn't answer me. Figures. Leeches are so incredibly annoying.

I sigh and start toward the door. If he can't even give me the answer to my easiest question, I don't see the point in sticking around.

"Don't leave." I whirl.

"Watch me."

I walk out of the room, fighting the urge to go running back to him like an abandoned puppy. When I'm far enough away, I start running.

**~0o0~**

I find myself in the courtyard at sunrise.

I don't know how I got there. I don't remember anything beyond needing to phase last night. I'm almost positive that I didn't come here to phase. All I remember was passing out from exhaustion in the forest.

And this just gets better and better.

Not only am I in this courtyard in human form, but I also have some thick cloak or something on. Once again, I don't know how it got there.

I slip back into the castle, silently making my way to my room.

When I enter, I shriek.

Everything is completely ransacked, like someone came in here looking for something and couldn't find it. It's a total mess.

Just another day in the mysterious life of Leah Clearwater.

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**Author's Note: So, yeah. It probably totally sucked, but at least I got it out of the way. **

**Please review! And ideas are welcome.**


	7. Chapter 7

**Author's Note: So sorry for the wait! I had the _worst_ case of writers block, and then life intruded into my writing time, so...yeah. But don't worry, I have big plans, yep, big, big, big plans for this story.**

**I hope you haven't given up on me...**

**So now, without further ado, here's Ch. 7!

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**

_We said goodbye, tried her hand at magic_  
_We couldn't make us disappear_  
_Not a day goes by I don't wish I had you_  
_So in a way I'm glad you're still here_  
_It's a bittersweet victory_  
_Lovin' the ghost in front of me_

_Now I can't laugh, can't cry_  
_And I can't run, can't hide_  
_What do I gotta do?_  
_What do I gotta do to keep you?_  
_What do I gotta do to keep you_  
_From doin' this to me?  
_~Keep You by Sugarland

* * *

**Ch. 7  
Leah's POV**

"Leah?" The door breaks down and a bunch of people enter my room, probably in response to my shriek of terror.

"Hm?" I ask, too caught up in my own terror to really listen.

"What happened?"

I whirl around then.

"_What happened?_ You want to know _what happened_? I entered my room this morning after a totally weird sleep walking spasm or something abnormal like that, and I find it completely destroyed!" I exclaim, shaking with rage.

_They didn't do this. You don't want to take it out on them. Just calm down. Save your energy for when you find the culprit_, I coach myself. I close my eyes and take several deep breaths before I feel calm enough to talk to them.

"Sorry," I mutter, realizing that I overreacted a tiny bit. I open my eyes and realize that it was Embry I snapped at.

"I was waiting for you to snap. Things have just started going from bad to worse since you got here," he says.

I smile slightly. Then I shoo them out of my room.

I kneel down and look around, searching for something, _anything_ I could use to track down the person who did this. But I can't find anything. There isn't even a scent in the air, since the idiots had to barge into my room with all of their vampire stench, therefore covering what faint scent might be left.

Soon I get up and throw some random clothes on, weaving through the destruction and exiting the room.

I wander aimlessly until I find myself back in the courtyard.

I sit on the wrought iron bench and pull my knees to my chest, losing myself in my thoughts.

"Leah?"

My head snaps up and I groan.

"If you are here to bother me, please go away. I am not in the mood for your idiocy," I say.

He takes the seat next to me looking incredibly awkward. I narrow my eyes at him for a second before giving him my back.

"Do you want to tell me why you walk around like a zombie?" I ask him, twirling around.

"No, not really."

"Well then, don't expect to receive any information from _me_, Marcus."

I start to walk away, but stop when I hear his voice.

"She was everything. And is now reduced to nothing."

"Ah. So this is all about your own damn pain, huh?" I ask, not able to fully suppress my bitterness on that particular topic.

"At least your Sam is still alive. A bittersweet victory."

"Are you kidding? Do you know what I go through every day, being inside his mind? You know nothing about my situation, so don't act like you do," I snap, walking over to a patch of trees. Then I grab a low hanging tree branch and pull myself up, going a few branches up and then settling down in the tree with my back against the trunk.

"You're going to fall," Marcus says nonchalantly, sitting at the base of my tree.

"Not that you care. And by the way, when I want your advice, I'll ask for it." I pull myself a few branches higher, just to show him how much I don't care what he thinks. As I pull myself into the next branch though, I hear a long, sickening crack, and the next thing I know I'm hurtling through the air toward the ground.

Typical.

I close my eyes, bracing myself for the impact of the ground, gritting my teeth against the scratching branches as I fall. But the impact never comes.

I slowly open my eyes, even though any idiot could figure out what had happened. Sure enough, when my eyes finally flicker open, they immediately meet ruby red ones.

We stare at each other in silence for a little while, neither of us able to break the connection, before he puts me down. Then he whispers, "told you," and suddenly I'm staring at empty space where Marcus just was. I smile triumphantly at the air from the expression on his face before he left. He was definitely feeling the imprint.

"What just happened?"

Just then, I hear a twig crack behind me. I whirl around and scan the courtyard before deciding that I imagined the whole incident.

That night, I head back to my room before remembering that it was completely destroyed. Instead of going into my room, I pass it and bang on the door next to it.

"Embry! Open up!"

I wait for a few seconds before deciding to break the door down. Unfortunately, right as I'm about to follow through with my decision, he opens the door, looking like I just woke him up.

"What do you want Leah?" He says tiredly.

"Does your room have a couch?" I ask. "My room was destroyed…so…yeah."

"Why don't you just go to the lobby?"

"Aw, Embry thanks so much for your kindness," I say sarcastically.

"Leah, please?"

I sigh discontentedly. "Fine," I snap.

I wander down the corridors to the lobby, where I see a couple couches. I walk over to one of them and sit down. Then I pull my legs up and toss and turn for a few hours before finally sinking into a fitful sleep.

The next morning, I wake up and almost have a panic attack before remembering that Embry forced me to sleep in the lobby. I growl to myself and walk towards the kitchen, not noticing the panicking guard members until Heidi smashes into me.

I tumble towards a wall. Once I land, I kick her off of me and stand up, glaring down at her.

"What's going on?" I growl.

"I don't know!" She exclaims.

"Oh, this is perfect. Just perfect!" I say sarcastically, pushing impatiently past her and looking for Demetri. He might know what's going on.

But, of course, I can't find him. As I double back to search again, I literally run into Felix.

Great.

Really, just spectacular.

In other words, kill me now!

"Hey, it's wolf girl!" He says, blocking my path. I roll my eyes, seriously considering shifting and ripping his empty head off.

"Leave. I'm not in the mood."

"Is that what you say whenever someone comes up to you? Charming." I freeze. I know that voice…

* * *

**Author's Note: Ha ha ha, I'm evil. Well, I told you I had big plans...**

**Tell me what you thought about it, please?**


	8. Chapter 8

**Author's note: I feel horrible for neglecting my fanfics! I am currently writing an actual book, and it has taken priority. I also hardly have any time any more, but I should still make time to update. I would tell you that I will update every week, but that would be a lie. This chapter was pretty hard to write. The others probably will be to. But I want to finish this.**

**Enjoy!

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**

_You're in my stars you know _  
_ Don't need no crystal ball to tell me so _  
_ Whispering in the air _  
_ Hoping that my words find you somewhere _  
_ Even when I close my eyes _  
_ I'll never recreate the Time that flies _  
_ The consequence is hanging there _  
_ The sky will fall but I don't care _

_ Meet me beneath my balcony and say _  
_ No one but you could ever fill my night _  
_ Be the sunlight in my every day _  
_ Underneath my balcony I'll say _  
_ No one but you could ever fill my night _  
_ Be the sunlight in my every day  
_Juliet~ Emilie Autumn

* * *

**Ch. 8 **

**Leah's POV**

Why do you hate me, world?

"What the hell are you doing here, Sam?" I snap.

"As your alpha, I have certain responsibilities, like making sure you haven't been devoured by vampires. And that Marcus leech called."  
And so I repeat: Why do you hate me, world?

Damn that idiot to hell!

"Well, the next time you have a friendly chat with him, tell him that Leah says to go die in a hole." _Because _I_ certainly won't be able to, even if I _was_ going to have another friendly conversation with him, _I think.

The one good thing about having a temper as short as mine is that I don't have to worry about the pain of being away from my imprint, since I'm usually pissed at him.

"Will do."

"Why do you insist on ruining my life?" I ask.  
"Because you're just so charming when you're pissed."

"You're an ass," I say.

"So they say."

"They wouldn't say it if it wasn't true!"

He raises his eyebrows and just stares at me. I know that he's testing me, but there is only so long I can look at him before I explode.

"Just leave me to wallow in my newest misery!" I snap. He smiles triumphantly.

"You haven't changed a bit."

"Neither have you," I say flatly.

I turn to walk away when I feel a strong hand on my wrist. Sam pulls me back as I fight his grip.

He opens his mouth to talk, but before the words come out my fist snaps back and collides with his nose. It is obvious that it's broken. His free hand goes to his face, and I can feel his hand shake. Before I can react, I hit the wall. Hard.

When I regain my balance, I look up through my black bangs and see a giant black wolf. Sam. That fact isn't what almost stopped my heart. What almost stopped my heart was the figure standing between the wolf and me: Marcus.

"Damn it, you idiot!" I mutter under my breath, shrugging off my jacket. I slip out of my sweats and shirt, ignoring Felix's hungry looks. I phase quickly.

I pass Marcus, intercepting Sam's impact as he attacks. I growl viciously and launch myself into the air, my front paws smacking down on his muzzle as I land.

I remember back to when I first phased. Afterward, Sam had me watch all of these dogfight videos so that I could learn how to defend myself if one of the bigger wolves attacked me, the smallest wolf. Some would call me the Omega. I refuse to be the Omega. I am not weak. Sam taught me that much, back when he still cared.

_I am Alpha material_, I tell myself.

_Like hell you are,_ Sam contradicts me.

My teeth rip into his flesh, pulling out a chuck of his shoulder.

_I'm not?_ I say smugly, prancing back toward the wall I came from.

_No. Not nearly good enough._

The wall of muscle and fur that is Sam jumps on me, pushing off his back legs. My breath leaves me in a _whoosh_.

Luckily, I have trained for something like this. I let my legs buckle under me and roll, pushing him off with my legs.

_Nice move,_ Sam acknowledges.

_It is, isn't it?_

He launches himself at me again, but I roll away. I push myself to my feet and tear at his back legs.

**Marcus's POV**

Watching her fight is extraordinary. One would think that she would not even have a chance since Sam is twice her size, but she is more nimble and, if you look closely, she is more calculating. She carefully thinks about each of her moves before she does them. Sam only acts on instinct.

I watch as they fight, noticing the things that even they don't notice. I slowly put these pieces together to calculate who is going to win. The advantages all point to Sam, but he also has the most disadvantages do to his size. They cancel each other out, and Leah ends up the most likely to win.

But that is simply a theoretical calculation. There is nothing saying that Sam can't win. If he gets lucky, he will come out on top. Leah isn't great at recovering.

I watch as his jaws bite down on Leah's back right leg. She manages to get free, but she is limping. She'd need more time than she's going to get to come back. Her leg buckles under her weight, and she tumbles.

I watch in horror as Sam goes in for the kill.

**Mystery POV**

They fight. They do not realize the danger that lurks near by. But watching Sam do my work for me is more than enough incentive to stay hidden. He has this fight won.

But the black haired vampire pushes off from the wall he was leaning against to join the fight.

I watch as Sam easily overcomes him. Leah is too injured to even think of saving him.

I watch in horror as vampire teeth sink into wolf flesh.

**Leah's POV**

"Sam!" I scream.

No…no…no. Sam.

As much as I hate him, I didn't want him to die.

That is my last thought before I pass out.

* * *

**Hehehe...I'm so mean.  
**


	9. Chapter 9

**Author's Note: I'm back!**

**I still do not own Twilight.**

_Life's not the same without my soldier  
Everytime we laughed  
The comfort that we had_

_He's the one whose been there for me all along  
He taught me to be strong enough  
When times are tough  
And keep the faith when I can't hold on_

_It's so hard to be apart this time of year  
The ones you love snould be near  
Material things lose all their value  
Cause all i want is him_

_Santa have you seen my soldier?  
Let him know that I miss him and I love him so  
Santa bring my soldier home  
I need him here in mhy arms  
Cause love's worth fighting for  
Santa bring him home  
~_The Stunners- Santa Bring My Soldier Home

* * *

**Of Love & Loss**  
**Ch. 9**

Out of everything that I have ever done, sitting in the hospital, watching Sam fight for his life is definitely the hardest. And knowing that it is all my fault makes it even harder.

"Leah, I-" a voice begins. I see red.

"You're a damn fool!" I scream. "What the hell is your problem?"

"My problem? You're the one who decided to fight him!"

"You shouldn't have bitten him! You know that your venom is poison to us!"

"Leah," he says patiently. "If I had not acted, you would be dead."

"Like you even care," I growl, voice low and dangerous. He sighs. I cut him off as he opens his mouth to reply. "And he wouldn't have killed me."

"That's what you think. You really have no idea what he was going to do," Marcus says.

"And you do?" I ask. He falls silent.

A few minutes pass in silence. I watch Sam struggle in the pain of the venom. Finally I break.

"Can't you do something for him?" I ask desperately, my voice sounding half strangled. "When Bella got bitten, Edward sucked the venom out of her, saving her from the change. Could someone here do that for Sam?"

"I don't think that it works that way."

"Try. That's all I ask. Just try," I reply.

After all, I think. It's the least he can do for me. He gives me a long, level look before nodding.

I look away as he bends down, not knowing if this will make things better or worse.

I hear Sam's shriek of agony and barely manage to repress a shudder. I never want to hear anything like that again.

I leave the room without waiting for the screaming to stop. I feel terrible.

I run. I run and run until I can't run anymore, and then I shift and run even more. By the time I stop, it is night, and I have no idea where I am.

I stay in my wolf form to sleep. It will be warmer, not to mention that I have no clothes with me. That would be awkward.

_Leah, damn you, everyone is worried sick! Get your shifted ass back to the castle!_

I jerk awake at the sound of Embry's thoughts in my head. I growl low in my throat before replying.

_I can't deal with that. Sam is probably _dying_, and I know that it is my fault. I feel horrible._

_Leah, he's okay. He's in some intense pain, but your suggestion saved his life. It's your fault that he is _alive. _Hope that you don't regret your idea now, _Embry's thoughts say. If I was a human, I would be groaning right now.

So I saved his life. The only good part of that is that when I get back, I can rub it in Marcus's face. He doubted my intelligence. Humph. Maybe I should leave now, while I can.

_Leah, you know that you can't,_ Embry says.

Right on cue agonizing pain rips through me. I writhe for a few minutes before it eases enough for me to get up. I shake my head in disbelief.

_Damn it, Embry,_ I think to him. I can picture his cocky wolf smirk.

_Wow, Leah. That was intense. Good luck with life._

_Maybe Marcus will listen to _you_, _I think. _Go tell him what you just felt. I shall limp my way back to the castle._

_Okay, Leah,_ he says skeptically.

Gritting my teeth, I take a slow step, trying to figure out where I came from. I look around and decide that I came from the east, even though I really have no idea where I came from. I stagger that way.

When the pain doesn't ease after a while, I realize that the castle must not be in this direction. So at the next chance I get, I turn right.

Walking in circles in the middle of unknown woods is the complete_ opposite_ of fun. Soon I begin to realize that I am hopelessly, desperately lost.

Which is potentially very problematic.

_Embry? _I try. Nothing. He is still in human form. He hasn't realized that I should have been home by now.

I feel along the connection. None of the wolves are in their shifted form.

_Probably at dinner with the imprints,_ I think bitterly.

Deciding that wandering around in circles isn't getting me any closer to Volterra, I sit down and wait.

Nightfall comes.

Nothing.

Daybreak.

Nothing.

I am hopelessly lost, and no one has noticed that I am missing. For some reason, that hurts. At least _one_ person should have noticed by now! Why haven't they?

_Maybe they have,_ my inner voice says. _Maybe they just don't think that you are important enough to go running after._

_That is a _lie, I respond angrily. But some little part of me wonders if that is true. Could Embry have been lying to me when he told me that everyone was worried? Could he have said that just to get me to return, because he is responsible for my safety here?

_I refuse to believe it_, I think to myself. _Someone _will_ come_.

But it sounds weak even in my mind. No one is going to come. I am never going to be able to return home. I will always have to live in this agony I am in right now.

A whimper escapes me at those thoughts. I don't _want_ to be alone forever, lost in these woods! I don't _want _to live my life in this agony!

My sadness quickly turns to anger. At myself, at Sam, at Marcus. Anyone I can attach even a sliver of blame to becomes a target of my explosive anger.

If Sam had not imprinted, I would still be with him. I would still be happy.

If _I_ had not imprinted, I would at least still have my dignity. I would still be at home, terrorizing anyone I could find _to_ terrorize. I would still be the alpha female. I would have whatever spark I lost when I came here.

If Marcus had not shown up with the Voltouri, I would not have imprinted. I would still be living my life. It wasn't perfect. It wasn't even _happy_ half of the time.

But it was better than this.


	10. Chapter 10

**Author's Note: yeah! i actually finished this chapter! **

_What if I need you, baby?  
Would you even try to save me?  
Or would you find some lame excuse to never be true?  
What if I said I loved you?  
Would you be the one to run to?  
Or would you watch me walk away without a fight?  
_~What If by Ashley Tisdale

* * *

**Of Love & Loss  
Ch. 10**

My eyes flicker open, and I look around, trying to figure out what woke me up.

_Leah_, a voice says. My eyes widen.

_Sam?_

_Where the hell are you?_ He asks angrily.

_Wouldn't _you_ like to know_, I respond. Then I curse myself for my stupidity. I _need_ him to like me right now so that he can get off his ass and come find me.

_Seriously, Leah_, he says flatly, clearly reading my thoughts.

_I don't _know, I reply.

_Great Leah. I thought that our issues with you were over after Jake got hurt. Now you're lost somewhere in Volterra. Wonderful._

_Cut the crap and come find me, Sam._

_How can I find you if I don't know where you are? _He asks, thinking he's smart. I roll my eyes.

_You are a _wolf, I say slowly. _Figure it out._

At that, I realize what I could do.

_Wait. _I send him the pictures of what I see.

_Great idea, Leah! We'll be there soon._

_We'll? _I ask in a small voice. He ignores me.

I sit in the same place for hours before I finally hear the movement. I stand slowly and shake out my fur, pacing around in my area.

_Embry? Sam?_ I ask. No answer.

Wonderful. Great. Perfect. Some random loser just stumbled upon my hiding spot. That's just great. Just what I needed.

Just as I am about to run them off, I catch the scent. That is when I notice that the pain is gone. Suddenly I know who found me.

"Leah?" He asks when he sees me. I growl despite myself, hoping to drive him off. He looks at me calmly, impassively, as if he couldn't be bothered to care that he was standing right in front of me.

_Yes, you ungodly asshole. Who the hell were you expecting?_ I answer in my head. But instead of shifting back so that I could tell him that, I just watch him.

_Way to go, Leah_! A voice in my head cheers. I would know them anywhere.

_Get the hell out of my head, Quil_.

_Why? _He whines. _Everyone is here. It's a freaking _party_._

_To celebrate which occasion? Annoy the hell out of Leah day?_

_Yes, _he says seriously. I roll my eyes.

_Where are Sam and Embry? And if they are nearby, I trust that they brought me clothes?_

_We're one step ahead of you, Leah,_ Embry's voice says. He shows me a picture of where they are. I immediately run towards them.

I phase back and pull on the dress they brought me.

When I return, the first thing I notice is that Marcus hasn't moved. As flattered as I am, I know that he is doing it because I am his guest, not because he actually cares about me. I ignore him and sweep by, trusting that he will lead me back to the castle.

"Leah," he calls. I ignore him. I haven't forgotten why I left the castle and get lost in the first place.

When we get back to the castle, I wander back to my room only to practically jump out of my skin.

"Get out! Get out! Get out!" I yell, shaking. She just smiles at me and stands, coming in my direction. She says nothing.

"Who the hell are you?" I ask.

"You already know me," she responds. I realize then that she is one of the blonde women from the Voltouri. Which one is she?

"Yeah. Okay. Sure. Now tell me why you are in my room," I snap.

"I just came to warn you that tonight is a 'celebration.' That means a ball. And a lot of blood."

"Oh, I think I'm going to be sick," I say, running into my bathroom. Why would she tell me that?

She comes up behind me. "I just thought that you should know. Aro will probably try to suck you into it."

I sigh, nodding. "You're right. Thanks." I turn around to face her, trying a soft smile. "I'm Leah, by the way."

She smiles. "Yeah. I know. I'm Athenodora." We're both quiet for a few seconds. "Now we need to find you something to where and someone to go with," she responds. I nod slowly, following her as she leaves the room. Looks like Leah Clearwater needs to find a date dress for the first time since Sam.

"Uh, Athenodora?" I ask. "Who am I going to go with?" She considers this.

"You could probably get anyone except Aro, Cauis, and Demetri. But if I were you, I'd pick a wolf." I nod.

"That's what I was afraid you were going to say. I refuse to go with Sam, be damned what he thinks." I consider something. "I suppose that I could ask Embry. As friends, of course."

She says nothing, though I thought that I saw her frown slightly. I shake my head, deciding that I imagined it.

We head to a fancy boutique in the center of Volterra. I look around while Athenodora throws stuff at me that I have to try on. By the time that I actually make it to the dressing room, I would guess that I had about half the store in my hands.

There were just as many dresses that looked hideous on me as there were dresses that made me shine. In the end, we decided on a simple royal purple strapless dress. We buy it and head back to the castle so that I can find myself a date.

I find Embry sleeping. I shake my head. Why doesn't that surprise me?

"Embry! Wake up! Now!" I shout, shaking him.


	11. Chapter 11

**Author's Note: this is the ball scene. **

**Disclaimer: I own nothing.**

* * *

Merely the sound of your voice  
Made me believe that, that you were her  
Just like the river disturbs  
my inner peace  
One I believed I could find  
Just a trace of her beloved soul  
Once I believed she was all  
Then she smothered my beliefs

One cold winter's night  
I may follow her voice to the river  
Leave me for now and forever  
Leave while you can

Somewhere in time  
I will find you and haunt you again  
Like the wind sweeps the earth  
Somewhere in time  
When no virtues are left to defend  
You fall in deep  
I was a liar in every debate  
I rule the forces that fueled your hate  
When the cold in my heart leaves  
It comes to an end  
And quietly I'll go to sleep

How could that first time recur  
When memories linger on and on  
What made me think you were her  
Helena is dead to all, dead to all  
Nothing can bring her to life  
Don't pretend that I'll be loving you  
Once I believed she was gone  
I'm corrupted from within

Leave, leave me for now and forever  
Leave while you can

Somewhere in time  
I will find you and haunt you again  
Like the wind sweeps the earth  
Somewhere in time  
When no virtues are left to defend  
You fall in deep  
I was a liar in every debate  
I rule the forces that fueled your hate  
When the cold in my heart leaves  
It comes to an end  
And quietly I'll go to sleep

Follow me into the light  
(Like ice on a lake of tears  
I'll take you through)  
Leave me tonight  
I've gone too far to begin all anew  
(Life fades in)  
With someone like you

Somewhere in time  
I will find you and love you again  
Like the wind sweeps the earth  
Somewhere in time  
When no virtues are left to defend  
You fall in deep  
I was a liar in every debate  
I rule the forces that fueled your hate  
When the cold in my heart leaves  
It comes to an end  
And quietly I'll go to sleep  
~The Haunting by Kamelot

* * *

**Of Love & Loss**___**  
Ch. 10**_

"Jeez, Leah! Tone it down!" He snaps. I smile. Maybe tonight will not be totally unbearable after all. When I don't make some smart-ass reply, he frowns. "What do you want, Leah?"

I relate my conversation with Athenodora about the "celebration" to him. When I finish, I close my eyes and take a deep breath, knowing that he could very well say no. And then where would I be?

"I was thinking that we could go together as friends, since everyone else has known each other for centuries. And I can't stand Sam."

He smiles and rolls his eyes. "I'm wounded, Leah. Asking me because you have no other choice," he shakes his head in mock sadness. "That hurts."

I smile and smack him in the back of the head.

"We have an hour." I drop the shopping bag that I was carrying. "I took the liberty of getting your outfit for you. I will break the door down when it is time to go." I turn to walk away.

"Hey, Leah?" He asks suddenly. I stop and turn back to him.

"Yes?" I ask.

"Why didn't you ask Marcus?" I freeze. How could he ask that? How stupid is he?

"Because Marcus wouldn't go with me," I snap coldly, leaving the room.

As she promised, Athenodora is waiting for me in my room when I get back. She takes one look at me and asks me what's wrong. I tell her that my nonexistent love life is none of her damn business. She looks affronted at that, but soon smiles again. I roll my eyes. It appears as though people in this place are either excessively happy, excessively pissed off, or excessively depressed. Why isn't there a happy medium? Dealing with their constant mood extremes is annoying.

When I look in the mirror after she is finished whatever the heck she did, I gasp in shock. My hair is brushed out and looks completely wild. Everything about me looks amazing. I don't think that I've taken the time to look this good since, well, Sam.

I smile and hug her, putting aside my hatred of vampires for the moment.

I walk outside and call through the door to Embry so that he knows I'm ready. Tonight might actually be fun. If there wasn't going to be the slaughter of innocent people, that is.

Embry steps out, turns to face me, and gasps. "You look great, Leah!" He says. I smile, not saying anything in response to that.

We follow Athenodora to her room where she disappears inside for a while before emerging with Caius, looking more beautiful than usual, if that is possible. Together the four of us walk to the throne room where the party is going to be held.

Aro and Sulpicia are already seated, and all most all of the guard is there. I scan the crowd, my eyes widening when I catch sight of a familiar blonde head. I shake my head. It couldn't be.

"Carlisle and his family are here," Athenodora informs me. "Aro wants to see if he can convince them to join the guard." She rolls her eyes. "Like that's ever going to happen."

I smile at that, wondering who else they invited. The room is practically filled with vampires.

"What are we celebrating?" I ask Athenodora, trying to ignore the horrible smell.

"The rise of the Voltouri to power," she responds. I sigh. I should have known. Anything that Aro can rub in someone's face he does.

The crowd falls silent, and I look up to see that Aro, Caius and Marcus are all seated in their thrones, commanding our attention.

After a long, incredibly boring speech, the party begins. Not that it is much of a party. It is like one of those traditional balls like in the old days.

But it still means song after song of slow dancing.

For the first dance, Embry and I dance. But after that, I move to sit on the edge of the plateau where the thrones are located. Heidi asked Embry to dance, so naturally he said yes.

Each of the Cullens offered to dance with me, but it was probably more because of duty than because they wanted to.

"Leah," a voice says. I look up to see Felix.

"Not if you were the last man on Earth," I respond, anticipating his question. He pouts and walks away. I smirk to myself.

I sit there most of the night, watching everyone have fun without me. Figures. Athenodora offered to sit with me, but I didn't see why I should deny her the fun that she's having.

Towards the end of the party, I feel a hand on my shoulder. I know who it is. Anyone with half a brain would know who it is. I sigh.

"What?" I ask, not bothering to face him.

"Dance with me."

"I don't see why I should," I respond bitterly. "It's not like you like me at all."

"You should because you have been sitting here all night long, and this is a party. You aren't supposed to sit around." I smirk.

"Yeah well, when you magically become me, you'll understand perfectly." Then I sigh. "Fine. One dance."

We walk to the floor and I manage to catch Athenodora's smile before she is spun around again. I roll my eyes. She planned this. She'll get it later.

About halfway through the song, something happens. It seems as if, for this one dance, that we have accepted our fates as imprints. It seems as if there is peace between us, these people constantly at war with each other. For that one song, I can almost pretend that everything I came here to do has happened.

And then the music dies.

He moves away from me like he was burned. I know that it shouldn't, I know that I should know by now that we can't be, but it still hurts.

I leave after that, knowing that the feast is about to begin. I alert Embry and we leave together.

* * *

**AN: OMG. This is being stupid. Nothing that I attmpt to do is working.**

**The song at the beginning is my favorite song ever. I was thinking that it could be from Marcus's POV.**  
**(the song)**

**Review, Please!**


	12. Chapter 12

**Author's Note: The electricity was out at my house all day Thursday. I couldn't post because of that. But I **_**did**_** manage to get some writing done. I am sitting in a motel room at 8:25 Friday night because my electricity is still off. This kind of thing only happens to me.**

**Chapter 12 everyone. This is…no words come to my head.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any part of the world. The only character who is mine is Giovanni Salvatore, my Italian heartthrob…**

_Sparkling Angel  
I believe  
You were my savior  
In my time of need_

_Blinded by faith  
I couldn't hear  
All the whispers  
The warnings so clear_

_I see the angels  
I'll lead them to your door  
There's no escape now,  
No mercy no more  
No remorse  
Cause I still remember  
The smile when you tore me apart_

_You took my heart  
Deceived me right from the start  
You showed me dreams  
I wish they'd turned into real  
You broke a promise and made me realize  
It was all just a lie_

_Sparkling Angel  
I couldn't see  
Your dark intentions  
Your feelings for me_

_Fallen Angel  
Tell me why  
What is the reason  
The thought in your eye  
_~Angels by Within Temptation

**Of Love & Loss  
Ch. 12**

The next few days pass by in a fog of agony that makes every second feel like an hour. I wish that I had never gone to that damn party. I wish that Marcus had never asked me to dance. I wish that I had not agreed so easily.

_But you did_, my inner voice says, always one to try and cheer me up. _And now it can't be undone_.

I slam my fist into my pillow. Damn this damn imprint. Damn Marcus and his stubborn crap. Damn this city. Damn it all!

I would like to leave. I really would. Maybe then I could go back to some semblance of a normal life. Maybe then I would have a chance to start over, maybe find someone new. It would never be like it could be with Marcus, but I could find happiness if I really wanted to. The pain would fade with time. I would adapt to living with it.

I could leave right now, I tell myself. Maybe if I leave before anything else happens, I could escape with my heart intact. Maybe if I left right now, I could still live the life that I was born to live, a life where I find happiness without having to depend on a bloodsucker to do it. A life without imprinting, without the change.

It is then that my first good idea in a long time hits me.

Maybe, if I left now and never phased again, the imprint would fade with time. I would age; I would not be condemned to live an extended life in this agony. If I didn't phase anymore, I could die with whatever human I chose to settle down with. I would never be forced to remember my time here, never be forced to remember how happy I had been last night, before reality slammed down on me and I was depressed again.

I almost convince myself. I am so close to finding Embry and walking out of this hellhole.

But once again reality knocks me flat on my back. At that moment, Athenodora walks in. It's like fate is conspiring against me. It's as if reality watches me personally, and sees that there is a chance that I am about to be happy.

"Leah," she says sternly. "You have been in here for three days. It's not healthy. You have to come out sometime."

"Nice to see you too," I mutter sarcastically. "What would you like me to do?" I snap.

"Go out. Have some fun for once. I know this great club," she says. I can't help but smile.

"Seriously?" I ask, close to laughter at how ridiculous the image of Athenodora in a club is.

"Hell yes. Sulpicia and I have been stuck in here for long enough. It's about time we _all_ had some fun. What do you say?" She says. I must admit that she poses a convincing argument. I sigh.

"I suppose _one_ night won't hurt anyone," I say, standing. I almost double over but I don't let myself. Leah Clearwater is one strong hellion.

She clasps her hands in excitement. "Great! Follow me. You can borrow some of our clothes. I'm sure that you don't have anything suitable for clubbing in Volterra."

I hate to admit it, but she's right. All I have here are old sweats and ball gowns.

"Sure."

They are easily prettier than me. Well, it helps that they are totally and completely perfect _without_ the clubbing gear and makeup.

"Relax, Leah," Athenodora says. "You look great. Doesn't she, Cia?"

Sulpicia nods. I figure that she is saying it more for her friends benefit than mine.

When we arrive at the club, I decide that tonight is going to be great. The music is loud, it's crowded, and I can see lots of ways to enjoy myself here. I smile at Athenodora as we get sucked into the crowd.

I make my way towards the bar, hoping to find a virgin pina colada. But just as I am about to take a seat, someone bumps into me and sends me flying into the counter. I push myself up and turn to glare at the boy behind me.

He has dark hair, blue eyes (I hadn't realize how much I've been missing normal eye colors!), olive skin on the paler side, and he is very tall and good looking. I sigh. He looks amazing, but I know that I will always think that Marcus looks better than everyone I compare him to. Damn imprinting!

"Hey," he says, sending me a soft smile. I raise an eyebrow and continue to glare at him. "Sorry for running into like that, I was-" He breaks off, looking me over. "Who are you?" He asks.

"Leah Clearwater," I reply without thinking, mentally kicking myself. He could be anyone! He could very well be a first rate creeper, though judging from his looks he doesn't have to resort to creeping to get people to date him.

"Giovanni Salvatore," he says. "Pleasure to meet you."

"You as well," I say, rolling my eyes. This is _so_ bizarre.

Athenodora takes that moment to walk up to me. "You like?" She asks, gesturing around her, signaling the club. I nod.

"Very nice." She looks at Giovanni before walking quickly away. I wonder what _that_ was about.

"So…is there anything I can get you?" He asks. I start to shake my head by nod at the last second.

"A virgin pina colada and a dance, in that order." My audacity surprises even myself. I guess I really am desperate if I am flirting with someone I just met. But then again, my imprint should be the one offering, so I guess that this is my way of creating jealousy. I am sure that Athenodora will report this to the others.

He smiles and motions for me to have a seat. I can't believe it. My plan actually worked!

After I drink a delicious virgin pina colada, he pulls me with him to the dance floor, and we spend all night in that same spot. I can't help but compare him to Marcus. He is much less uptight, obviously has more fun and enjoys life more. His eyes show what he wants. With Marcus, you never know. He is much more carefree as well.

The music pumps fast dance songs, and I can't remember the last time that I've had this much fun. I've also noticed that the agony from Marcus's presence is simply an annoyance now as opposed to the force that it was before. I can't help but wonder if Giovanni has anything to do with it.

We dance the night away and soon Athenodora finds me and tells me that we have to leave. I mock pout, knowing that she's right. As I turn to walk away, I feel someone's hand on my wrist. I turn my head to see Giovanni. He presses something into my hand and I reflexively close my fingers into a fist.

Safely in my room, I unfold the piece of paper with his number on it and smile. Things in Volterra are looking up.

But as I slip off to sleep, I can't stop the nagging feeling that something is very wrong.

**Author's Note: This is a key chapter. Have you ever heard of a little dramatic device known as foreshadowing? If so, you might want to reread the song lyrics while thinking about Giovanni…**

**I think that I might have just given away the new ground in plot making I just gained. Damn. Oh well.**

**~Nephi Lockwood**


	13. Chapter 13

**Author's Note: The good news: the power is back on as of Saturday. The bad news: I still have no internet. I really hate snow now. The damn snow storm is the reason that all of this crap has been going on. **

**Anyway, I'm done complaining. This is the 13****th**** chapter, and a big piece of the conspiracy puzzle is revealed. Plus, Leah goes out again.**

**Power update: Tuesday night, 6:41, power on, internet back. In case you were wondering.**

**I hope this chapter was worth the wait!**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight. **

_There's no use in crying  
All my tears won't drown my pain  
Free me from your sorrow  
I can't grieve you again_

_I watched you let yourself die  
And now it's too late to save you this time_

_You bury me alive  
And everybody's got to breathe somehow  
Don't leave me to die  
Too consumed by your own emptiness and lies_

_All I did was love you  
Now I hate the nightmare you've become  
I can't let you fool me  
I won't need you again_

_I watched you let yourself die  
And now it's too late to save you this time_

_You bury me alive  
And everybody's got to breathe somehow  
Don't leave me to die  
Too consumed by your own emptiness and lies  
_~Bury Me Alive by We Are The Fallen

**Of Love & Loss  
Chapter 13**

I creep through the castle corridors towards the front door. I need to phase. I haven't run in the longest time, and it is starting to get to me. I need that running to help me clear my thoughts. It appears as though trying to stop phasing will never work. It has become too large a part of my life.

I break through the castle doors and into the forest, slipping off my robe and shifting into a furry mass of awesomeness. I run for a long time.

By the time I return to my robe, it is time for me to meet Giovanni. It has been a week or so since that night at the club, and we have talked to each other every couple of days on the phone. Today, he asked me out.

I smile at the thought as I sit in front of my mirror and twirl a strand of my hair. I am wearing a strapless little black dress that I bought on the day I went shopping with Athenodora. My hair is brushed out, makeup done, and I am trying to decide if I want to curl my hair or not. I glance at the clock and my mind is made up. It is time to leave. 6:00 pm. We are going to dinner and then catching a late night showing of the latest horror movie. It is going to be great.

I try not to think about Marcus as I grab my purse and walk towards the door. Thinking like that will only make me wonder if I am doing the right thing tonight.

But unfortunately, avoiding all thoughts of him is impossible because he is standing in the lobby talking to Demetri, whose eyes widen when he sees me. That causes Marcus to turn around.

I lower my eyes, refusing to see his because that would make me stay. I also don't want to see him look me over and think about it before deciding that I'm not good enough for him. A heart can only take so much of that before it breaks irreparably.

"Going somewhere, Leah?" He asks. I look up, raising my chin defiantly.

"Maybe I am, maybe I'm not. Why do you care?" I ask.

"Where?"

"Does it _matter_?" I ask. His expression clearly says that it _does,_ in fact, matter. "Away from here," I snap. And without another word, I walk out the door, ignoring the pull from the bond that attempts to pull me back to him. Maybe I won't ever have what I would have with Marcus, but I still have a right to be happy. The imprint does not control me.

As if to punctuate that thought, I open the door and slam it shut behind me.

I meet Giovanni at the center of town, by the fountain. He smiles when he sees me, and I can't help smiling back. Sure, he may not be Marcus, but he's pretty damn close as far as replacements go.

We walk through town towards a ritzy restaurant that I have passed before on my walks around the city. Judging by the exterior, it is _very_ expensive. I glance sharply at him, but he is already walking into the place. I smile sadly and shake my head.

We are led to a secluded table by a waitress who is obviously not a people person. She disappears into the kitchen as soon as we are seated. I roll my eyes.

The dinner passes quietly, with little conversation. But I begin to feel like I know more about him than most people do, which is a strange and slightly scary feeling.

We walk to the movie, and buy our tickets and popcorn. We were the first ones there, so we get the best seats, right in the back row. More people file in and the movie begins.

**Marcus's POV**

I pace around my room, wondering why the hell I care so much. It's not like I'm her keeper or anything. But I can't shake the feeling that whatever she is doing is a bad idea. It's weird, particularly because she didn't tell me what she would be doing. It just seems like something bad is going to happen.

I sigh and sit down on my bed, running a hand through my hair. I need a drink.

I walk out of my room and down the hall until I get to the stares that lead to the kitchen. I know that we have some bottles of reserve blood hiding somewhere in one of the refrigerators.

As I am walking to the red oak door that leads to the kitchen, I pass Caius. That's odd. Usually Aro and I are the only ones who randomly decide to wander the palace. With Aro, I think it's because he's crazy. With me…well I have my reasons.

Suffice it to say that this is odd behavior from Caius.

"Caius!" I call out. He turns to face me.

"Marcus," he responds.

"Why are you wandering the castle so late?" I ask, getting that strange foreboding feeling again, stronger this time. He smiles, but it looks forced and Cheshire cat-like. I find that the strangest thing of all.

"Why brother!" He exclaims. "You make it sound as though you care!" I roll my eyes.

"I don't." I snap flatly.

"Well then I will be on my way," he says, beginning to walk away again. I sigh and shake my head.

I walk into the kitchen and see Athenodora. It seems as though everyone is wandering tonight. I notice that a bond of hers seems to have strengthened recently. I realize with a shock that it is the bond to _Leah_.

I get a closer look at her and I see that she appears drawn and paler than usual. Her eyes are almost black, and she is white as a ghost. Even for a vampire that is not a good sign.

"Athena?" I ask. She glances up at me, and I see everything in her eyes that I need to see. The panic and the desperation seem to be the biggest difference. She is usually always happy. Something is definitely wrong.

"Athena, look at me," I say, moving to sit by her. She does, and suddenly she starts talking quickly.

"He's going to kill her," she says, looking at me through wide eyes. "We have to help her."

"Who is going to kill who?" I ask calmly. She closes her eyes, and when she opens them again, they are calmer but no less terrified.

"Caius is going to kill Leah."

**Author's Note: Hehehehehehehehehe  
What will Marcus do? How does Caius plan to kill Leah? How does Athenodora even **_**know**_** this information? Keep reading to find out.**

**Reviews are very much appreciated! Thanks to everyone who has reviewed so far. I think that I finally know where this story is going, if I could ever get these chapters posted :(**

**Anyway, hope you enjoyed it!**

**~Nephi Lockwood**


	14. Chapter 14

**Author's Note: This story feels as though it is coming to an end. I'm feeling around chapter 25 and it will be over, probably less. It is not going to be long, but I know for a fact that I am going to write a sequel. I already have the first few chapters planned out. That will be a while though.**

**Anyway, I wanted to answer . Questions. **

**1. Athena and Marcus go back very far. She trusts him for whatever reason she has.  
2. An imprint is a powerful thing.**

**Chapter 14. Wow. **

**Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight.**

* * *

_I want to hold you to the sun  
I want to be your faithful one  
I want to show you all the beauty you don't even know you hold_

_I'm hurting you for your own good  
I'd die for you; you know I would  
I'd give up all my wealth to buy you back the soul you never sold  
_~Liar by Emilie Autumn

* * *

**Of Love & Loss  
Chapter 14**

**Marcus's POV**

"_Athena, look at me," I say, moving to sit by her. She does, and suddenly she starts talking quickly._

"_He's going to kill her," she says, looking at me through wide eyes. "We have to help her."_

"_Who is going to kill who?" I ask calmly. She closes her eyes, and when she opens them again, they are calmer but no less terrified._

"_Caius is going to kill Leah."_

"What?" I ask, not comprehending. Sure, Caius is a pissed off asshole most of the time, and he may have a well-known grudge against werewolves, but he wouldn't go that far, would he? That doesn't seem at all like Caius.

"You heard me," she responds sadly. I nod, my eyes widening.

"How do you know?" I ask. She looks offended that I even have to ask.

"I'm his wife. He tells me things."

I suddenly remember back to that night when Leah and Embry were in the kitchen talking about information that Leah overheard. She had immediately pointed the finger at us. Turns out I shot down the ideas that were actually right.

"Where is she now?" I ask. She closes her eyes, and I know that she would be crying right now if it were possible.

"Out. In town. With Giovanni Salvatore." She responds slowly.

Giovanni Salvatore…no one has seen or heard from him in years. He was the one human to ever escape our clutches. How could no one realize that he was back in our city?

"Where?" I ask. She shakes her head helplessly.

"I don't know. She wouldn't tell me."

I lean back in my chair, letting everything sink in. No wonder she had been acting the way that she had earlier. She had wanted to get out of there without running into me because of the "imprint."

I can't believe that I am thinking about this right now. I immediately push back from the table and pull two bottles of blood out of the fridge and place one in front of Athenodora, keeping the other for myself.

**Leah's POV**

Well, he may not be the best person in the world to come to a movie with, what with the smart ass comments he makes at all the scary parts that make it funny instead of terrifying. But I have to admit, it was a great date. We split the popcorn and laughed when everyone else in the theatre was screaming their heads off. We were the targets of several dirty looks, but it was worth it.

I hate to admit it, but this is pretty much the first date I have been on since Sam.

We part ways at the fountain where we met,and he promises to call me again. I smile as I walk back to the castle, unbelievably happy. I figured that the date would be overshadowed by thoughts of Marcus, but I found that as soon as we sat down, all thoughts of Marcus were driven out of my mind. It is actually kind of scary. That kind of thing just doesn't happen, even in unhappy imprints.

When I get back to the castle, I walk to my room and pull on a pair of gray sweat pants and a navy blue tank top to sleep in. I find that I fall asleep as soon as my head hits the pillow, something that is a nice change from my usual tossing and turning for hours.

I wake up the next morning fully rested. I get the feeling that something is up, but I ignore it. Today is going to be a great day, I can feel it.

I walk downstairs to the kitchen and grab a fiber one bar for breakfast before going up to the library. I need some good reading. I wonder if they have anything current, or if their whole library is full of classics. That would be a lot of classics, but they are very old. I can see how they could accumulate a collection of classics that large.

I walk through the shelves, breathing in the smell of old books as I look for something interesting to read. Finally I find a shelf of modern smutty romance novels that I am sure must be Heidi's. She seems like that kind of girl.

I pull out The Last Song by Nicholas Sparks. I had heard good things about the movie, so I want to read the book.

I don't know how much time passes by before the lights suddenly shut off. I sigh irritably and push myself to my feet, suddenly glad that I am a shapeshifter. I can see in the dark better than the average human, though not nearly as good as a vampire.

I close my book, keeping my finger inside to mark my page and slowly find my way to my room. This is a strange thing. I get the feeling that this happened on purpose. Someone purposefully shut off the lights. But who? And why? I have no idea.

I make it to my room and walk over to the window, pulling the curtains open to let some sunlight enter the room so that I can continue my book.

I hear the sounds of fighting from down below, and I finally set aside my book to go check it out. I wonder if there is an unwanted intruder or if one of the Voltouri turned traitor. I chuckle to myself at that. The thought of a traitorous member of the Voltouri is laughable.

I see Demetri, Felix, Jane, and Alec fighting against men in black. I snort. Men in black. How original. How cliché.

I debate whether or not to join the fight when my mind is suddenly made up for me by a cool grip on my arms. All I know is that it is not Embry and it is not Marcus. So my fighting instincts kick in.

I slam an elbow back into their stomach, cursing my stupidity. That won't do anything! But to my shock, the breath leaves my attacker's lungs in a whoosh. I turn around, confused, and stop short.

_Oh my God._

* * *

**Author's Note: Aw, I'm so mean. This is probably the biggest cliffy in this story. **

**Reviews please! I feel like people are actually reading my stories when I find reviews in my inbox. And they make me feel good…**

**~Nephi Lockwood**


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